Murray, S. L., Holmes, J. G., & Griffin, D. W. (1996a). The benefits of positive illusions: Idealization and the construction of satisfaction in close relationships. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 70(1), 79-98.
Authors proposed that relationship satisfaction happiness are related with idealistic, rather than realistic, perceptions of one’s partner. Researchers asked both members of married and dating heterosexual couples to rate themselves and their partners on a variety of interpersonal attributes in order to provide baselines for assessing relationship illusions. Participants also rated the typical and ideal partner. Path analyses revealed that people’s perceptions of their partners were more a reflection of their own self-images and ideals than of their partners’ self-reported characteristics.
In general, results showed that loving men and women viewed their partners more positively than their partners viewed themselves. Furthermore, these idealized constructions forecasted higher levels of satisfaction. Individuals in relationships were happier when they idealized their partners and their partners idealized them. Taken together, these findings suggest that a certain level of idealization or illusion may be a necessary component of fulfilling dating and even marital relationships.
Murray, S. L., Holmes, J. G., & Griffin, D. W. (1996b). The self-fulfilling nature of positive illusions in romantic relationships: Love is not blind, but prescient. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 71(6), 1155-1181.
Authors proposed that satisfying and stable relationships reflect partners’ ability to see imperfect partners in idealized ways. In their study of the long-term benefits (or potential costs) of positive illusions, researchers asked both members of dating couples to complete idealization and well-being measures three times over the course of a year.
According to path analyses, idealization had a variety of self-fulfilling effects. When romantic partners idealized one another the most, relationships were more likely to last—even in the face of conflicts and doubts. Intimates who idealized one another more initially reported higher levels of satisfaction and lower levels of conflicts and doubts over the year. Finally, people began to share their partners’ idealized images of them. In conclusion, intimates who idealized one another appeared to be more foresighted than blind, creating the relationships they desired as romances progressed.
Murray, S. L., & Holmes, J. G. (1997). A leap of faith? Positive illusions in romantic relationships. Personality and social psychology bulletin, 23(6), 586-604.
Authors proposed that satisfying, stable relationships reflect romantic partners’ ability to see imperfect relationships in somewhat idealized ways—to take a risk. Researchers asked both dating and married couples to complete a measure of relationship illusions, which included idealized perceptions of the partners’ attributes, exaggerated perceptions of control, and unrealistic optimism.
Concurrent analyses revealed that relationship illusions predicted higher levels of satisfaction, love, and trust, as well as lower levels of conflict and ambivalence in both dating and marital relationships. A longitudinal follow-up of the dating sample revealed that the stronger individuals’ initial illusions were more likely to persist in relationships. Increases in later satisfaction were also predicted by relationship illusions, but not vice versa. Positive illusions, according to these findings, capture a prospective sense of conviction or security that is not simply isomorphic with satisfaction.
Murray, S. L., & Holmes, J. G. (1997). A leap of faith? Positive illusions in romantic relationships. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 23(6), 586-604. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167297236003