In an age of endless social media scrolling, does the ‘next best thing’ replace the ‘great thing’ as an adversary? Researchers explore how the cognitive overload of choices in modern dating apps can be challenging for men and women, transforming love into the gamification of relationships. The interface of dating apps is reimagining human connection, thus changing the nature of modern love.
Modern Intimate Practices in Online Dating Apps are quite diverse and special in many respects. Is Virtual Love in Online Dating as Good as Dating Face-to-Face?
The Endless Browsing, Scrolling, and Swiping…
Many modern men and women are constantly browsing and scrolling through social media and dating apps. Ego-scrolling on dating apps and doom-scrolling on social media are often motivated by a desire for external validation, dopamine hits, or a distraction from boredom, loneliness, or low self-esteem.
They can do this to seek connections and possible matches for friendship, sexual and romantic adventures, or long-term relationships. Unfortunately, such scrolling often leads to fatigue, mismatched expectations, and feeling disheartened if not intentional. Having more options actually makes men and women less satisfied, experiencing “decision fatigue.”
Browsing Through Multiple Profiles…
Men and women interested in relationships spend their in-app time browsing through a large number of profiles on dating apps. They tend to swipe through a high number of profiles. They behave this way because dating platforms offer them plenty of affordances, such as a large selection of options and favorable social feedback in the form of matches. These platforms encourage them to browse through many profiles (Cummings & Mays, 2021).
Many men and women tend to swipe through high numbers of profiles because many of them are undecisive in their search for a perfect match. They may prefer to be slow in browsing and thoughtful in decision-making. However, the design of dating apps encouraged them to make snap decisions (Binder, Stevic, Matthes, & Thomas, 2024; Cummings & Mays, 2021; Thomas, Binder, & Matthes, 2024; Thomas, Binder, Matthes, & Stevic, 2023; Wu & Chiou, 2009).
Is More the Better?
The availability of many options is designed to enhance users’ likelihood of acceptance and social engagement, subsequently boosting their confidence in the pursuit of a partner. Yet swiping through multiple profiles on dating apps appears to yield different consequences. The growing number of available profiles leads to the decrease in the likelihood of mutual acceptance and commitment readiness. Users tend to exhaust their time on extensive searching rather than initiating interactions.
Consequently, instead of enhancing users’ confidence, an abundance of profiles tends to overwhelm them, leading to decreased satisfaction with choices, heightened fear of being single, and diminished self-esteem (Pronk & Denissen, 2020; Brady, Baker, Agnew, & Hadden, 2022; Wu & Chiou, 2009; D’Angelo & Toma, 2017; Thomas, Binder, & Matthes, 2022).
When Men and Women Encounter the Paradox of Choice on Dating Apps
Thus, some psychological factors attract men and women to use dating apps, while others deter them from doing so. On the one hand, dating apps motivate them to gain self-validation, pacify their fear of being single, and understand their mate value. On the other hand, the major downside of dating apps is the feeling of being overwhelmed. Browsing through a high number of profiles brings multiple options, while decision-making creates a challenge of choice.
The paradox of choice explains why more is less. While having more choices seems to be a good thing, an overload of multiple options causes anxiety, indecisiveness, and dissatisfaction, rather than freedom and happiness. This way, more choices raise the possibility for regret, and excessive expectations lead to “analysis paralysis,” thus making people feel worse about the choices they do make. As the number of options increases, individuals may experience choice overload (Schwartz, 2004).
An Overload of Multiple Options Can Be Overwhelming
Having numerous options is problematic. Too many options provide individuals various occasions to ruminate about counterfactual outcomes and increase the perceived risk of a wrong decision and regret. When people try to choose between several options, it becomes more difficult for them to justify a decision to themselves and others. Consequently, choice constraints may be regarded as alleviating, as they provide rationales and stimulate ego-defensive mechanisms (see Schwartz, 2004; Thomas, Binder, & Matthes, 2025, for review).
In dating apps, when men and women have an abundance of options to choose from, they may feel like they have to be in a fulfilling relationship. They may also engage in social comparison and blame failure on their own shortcomings. Having too many choices can negatively affect the outcome of decisions. For instance, people may be less satisfied with their choice and how quickly they accept it. Researchers have seen these effects in the context of product and gambling choices, as well as in choosing where to go on holiday or who to date (see Schwartz, 2004; Thomas, Binder, & Matthes, 2025, for review).
More Choices That Dating Apps Provide Are Challenging to Make a Good Decision
In a recent study, researchers found that “more choice” isn’t necessarily better when it comes to dating apps (Thomas, Binder, & Matthes, 2025).
While men and women think seeing more profiles is fun and increases their chances of finding a match, the opposite can be true. Looking at too many profiles leads to “choice overload,” which makes people feel overwhelmed and actually makes them less likely to like anyone (lower acceptance rates).
How to Browse Dating Apps?
Actually, how people swipe matters. They can use two ways to make decisions. One way is locomotion mode, when they are just “going for it”—swiping quickly and constantly moving to the next person for the sake of activity. Another way is assessment mode, when they are more analytical and careful about making the “right” choice.
So, how do you browse dating apps?
A recent study found that swiping in locomotion mode—fast, repetitive swiping—is actually worse for you. It causes you to feel overwhelmed much faster and can negatively impact your self-esteem and how you view your own “value” as a partner (Thomas, Binder, & Matthes, 2025).
Still, you should keep in mind and remember the Mobility of Intimate Relationships in Online Dating Apps and the Challenges to Being Open in Online Dating Apps.
To have a better experience and protect your mental health, the researchers suggest users set a limit by manually restricting how many profiles you look at in one sitting. Another option is to choose different apps and use platforms that naturally limit the number of daily matches you see. Besides, you can slow down, avoiding mindless, rapid swiping, as it turns a supposedly “fun” activity into something that hurts your self-concept.
References
Binder, A., Stevic, A., Matthes, J., & Thomas, M. F. (2024). Dating algorithms? Investigating the reciprocal relationships between partner choice FOMO, decision fatigue, excessive swiping, and trust in algorithms on dating apps. New Media & Society. https://doi.org/10.1177/14614448241270542.
Brady, A., Baker, L. R., Agnew, C. R., & Hadden, B. W. (2022). Playing the field or locking down a partner?: Perceptions of available romantic partners and commitment readiness. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 101, 104334. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jesp.2022.104334
Cummings, J. J., & Mays, K. (2021). Trait motivational reactivity as a predictor of online dating app behavior. Computers in Human Behavior, 121, 106775. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chb.2021.106775
D’Angelo, J. D., & Toma, C. L. (2017). There are plenty of fish in the sea: The effects of choice overload and reversibility of online daters’ satisfaction with selected partners. Media Psychology, 20(1), 1–27. https://doi.org/10.1080/15213269.2015.1121827
Olivera-La Rosa, A., Arango-Tobón, O. E., & Ingram, G. P. (2019). Swiping right: face perception in the age of Tinder. Heliyon, 5(12).
Orosz, G., Benyó, M., Berkes, B., Nikoletti, E., Gál, É., Tóth-Király, I., & Bőthe, B. (2018). The personality, motivational, and need-based background of problematic Tinder use. Journal of Behavioral Addictions, 7(2), 301-316.
Pronk, T. M., & Denissen, J. J. A. (2020). A rejection mind-set: Choice overload in online dating. Social Psychological & Personality Science, 11(3), 388–396. https://doi.org/10.1177/1948550619866189
Schwartz, B. (2004). The paradox of choice: Why more is less. Ecco.
Thomas, M. F., Binder, A., & Matthes, J. (2022). The agony of partner choice: The effect of excessive partner availability on fear of being single, self-esteem, and partner choice overload. Computers in Human Behavior, 126, 106977. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chb.2021.106977
Thomas, M. F., Binder, A., & Matthes, J. (2024). The psychological influence of dating app matches: The more matches the merrier? New Media and Society, 26(12), 6995–7019. https://doi.org/10.1177/14614448231161598
Thomas, M. F., Binder, A., Matthes, J., Stevic, A. (2023). 99 + matches but a spark ain’t one: Adverse psychological effects of excessive swiping on dating apps. Telematics and Informatics, 78, 101949. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.tele.2023.101949
Thomas, M. F., Binder, A., & Matthes, J. (2025). Decision-making on dating apps: Is swiping more less and swiping right wrong?. Media Psychology, 1-32. https://doi.org/10.1080/15213269.2025.2555430
Wu, P.-L., & Chiou, W.-B. (2009). More options lead to more searching and worse choices in findings partners for romantic relationships online: An experimental study. Cyberpsychology & Behavior, 12(3), 315–318. https://doi.org/10.1089/cpb.2008.0182