The idea of romantic love inspires men and women in many societies. Folk and literary stories across cultures are full of romantic joy and happiness but also drama, suffering, and even personal tragedy. They are often bittersweet. They are engaging for readers and listeners in their emotional ambivalence. What about the reality of romantic love? How does Nicaraguan love look in the small town of San Juan?
Across the history of humankind, in ancient civilizations, in traditional societies, and in modern societies, some people dared to fulfill their romantic dreams of love in their lives. Some men and women succeeded, while others did not. Some cultural contexts have been more conducive to romantic love than others.
Let us consider the case study of a Nicaraguan rural community in Central America. The “absentee patriarchy” in that context creates peculiar romantic and family relationships. Since a man often has more than one wife and family, he is away from them for quite a long period of time. Nevertheless, he continues to be in control of his wife and her life. So, we see that the reality of marriage and family life does not look romantic.
What about the ideals of love? Here is an example of men and women’s romantic love in the small Nicaraguan town of San Juan.
What Is Nicaraguan Love in Spanish?
The experience of romantic love engages a variety of feelings, emotions, dispositions, and actions. The lexicon of love certainly reflects that. In each culture, there are at least several words that are in typical usage by people (Karandashev, 2017, 2019).
In the Nicaraguan Spanish-speaking culture, the typical conversational words that people use to express their meanings of love are such as “amor” (love), “amar” (to love), querer (to love or care for), ser cariñoso (to be loving), ser tierno (to be tender), and ser bueno (to be good). The implicit notions of love, however, add more variants (Hagene, 2008).
What Is Romantic about Nicaraguan love?
Through social media, Nicaraguan women and men are acquainted with the notion of romantic love. In romantic love, passionate love and sexuality are intricately linked. And exclusivity in a romantic relationship implies a need for fidelity.
According to these romantic ideas, psychological experiences, emotional attachments, and expressive attributes of love take precedence, along with emotional and verbal intimacy. In romantic love, sex expresses strong passion and deep intimacy. Interpersonal attraction, free will, and the expectation of reciprocity flourish in romantic love. The values of practical, economic, and obligatory considerations are diminished.
Public Media Representations and the Reality of Nicaraguan Love
People in the small town of San Juan have lots of opportunities to watch romantic movies and soap operas on TV. In many families, women, girls, men, and boys watch beautiful and intriguing romantic stories in “telenovelas,” which are entertaining like soap operas. These are often their daily enjoyable habits to follow the unfolding romantic narrative episode by episode.
The main theme of such telenovelas is love (amor), with a romantic plot that progresses from one day to the next. This way, people learn about romantic love stories. These telenovelas’ plots and characters are frequently mentioned in people’s daily conversations. Thus, people are familiar with romantic themes, storylines, and screenplays. They learn about romance, love, and romantic expressions from these romantic narratives.
However, many characteristics of the social realities in which men and women live in this little town, such as gender roles, gender segregated leisure, and everyday living practices, are not conducive to romantic love (Hagene, 2008).
Hierarchical Nicaraguan Love
The communities in Nicaraguan culture have enduring explicit norms of gender hierarchy, in which men are of a higher rank than women. They have more freedom in relationships than women do. In both romantic and family relationships, their roles are unequal. According to culturally normative stereotypes, men are dominant and women are submissive. Nicaraguan culture has gender inequality between men and women.
These public stereotypes affect both romantic and family relationships. According to machismo cultural norms, men are supposed to be active, take initiative, and take the lead in romantic dating. According to marianismo cultural norms, women should be responsive, accept (or not accept) the man’s proposals, and passively follow his rules. The machismo behavior of men shows masculinity and dominance of some kind, while the marianismo behavior of women shows femininity and submissiveness (Karandashev, 2017).
These culturally specific concepts of machismo and marianismo have an impact on both romantic and familial relationships. Men’s romanticism tends to be expressed in their demonstrations of pride, womanizing dispositions, and assertive behaviors. Internal feelings, intimacy, and the expression of love are undervalued. The communicative lexicon of love is limited to little talking and a few verbalized sentiments. Sexual motivation in romantic relationships is strong.
A controversial feeling that Nicaraguan women experience in their families is divided love.